The System Wasn’t Built for Me — I Built Anyway: A Toby McCosker Article

Not Made to Fit

If you’re waiting for permission, you’ll be waiting a long time.

I learned early that the system wasn’t built for people like me—those without the right connections, polish, or a family name that opened doors.
It didn’t offer shortcuts. It didn’t hand out second chances. And yet, I built anyway.

I’m Toby McCosker, and this is what it means to build in a system that was never built for you.

Barriers Aren’t Always Walls—Sometimes They're People

Every time I tried to grow, someone told me I wasn’t ready.
Too young. Too bold. Too unconventional.

The old guard made the rules, and I was breaking them just by trying to play. But every “no” became a blueprint.
I didn’t need their staircase—I started pouring concrete for my own.

And when the banks, councils, or clients hesitated, I learned to carry the weight myself.

I Built What I Needed

I didn’t just build businesses. I built systems.

• Systems that didn’t rely on being liked—just respected.

• Systems that could handle pressure, scrutiny, and sabotage.

• Systems that protected workers, delivered value, and kept moving even when everything else stalled.

Because if you wait for someone to hand you the keys, you’ll never get past the gate.

You Don’t Need to Fit—You Need to Function

The system was never going to celebrate someone like me.
But it couldn’t ignore me either.

When you deliver results, when you show up under pressure, when you refuse to quit—you become undeniable.

The truth is, I didn’t need to be inside the club. I built something outside that people couldn’t look away from.

Toby McCosker’s Take: Don’t Ask to Belong—Build Your Own Blueprint

I didn’t set out to defy the system. I just couldn’t wait around for it to catch up.

So I built anyway.

And now? The same people who doubted me are asking how I did it.

If the system wasn’t built for you, good. That means you’re not boxed in. You’re free to build something that works.

More from Toby McCosker

Lessons from the Frontline: Leading Through Adversity
How pressure shaped leadership beyond the job site.

Reputation vs. Reality: What the Media Got Wrong
Why headlines don’t always tell the full story.

Tobias (Toby) McCosker is the founder of Built By Toby. After two decades in construction and business, he now shares raw lessons from the frontline.
Explore more at BuiltByToby.com.au